Elsa's point of view: For The First Time in Forever (reprise)
by ElsaIsAmazing
Summary: This is Elsa's point of view for The First Time in Forever reprise scene. I hope you enjoy it!


**Hi guys! This is my first Frozen fan fiction ever. It's in Elsa's point of view about the ice palace scene. Elsa is my favorite character so I write a little one-shot that gives us a glimpse into the pain she feels every day and the burdens she struggles to overcome. I hope you like it!**

I was so happy. I was finally free. I could go wherever I wanted to go, do whatever I wanted to do, and use my powers any way I wanted. I couldn't hurt anyone anymore... Or so I thought.

One day, I sat in one of the rooms of my new ice palace, making miniature snowflakes. All of a sudden, I thought I heard a knock. But that couldn't be right because I was alone. '_I'm losing my head,'_ I thought. _It was all those years of having Anna knocking on my door.' _But I was wrong.

I heard a familiar voice. "Elsa? It's me, Anna!" I quickly jumped up to go drive Anna away. I couldn't hurt her. I couldn't act happy to see her. I had to stay away.

'_Conceal, don't feel, conceal, don' t feel,' _I repeated in my head as I walked out. "Anna!" I said in shock when I saw her at the bottom of a staircase. She had come all the way to see me. I was touched, but I didn't let it show.

"Whoa! Elsa! You look… Different! It's a good different! And this place… It's amazing!" Anna gushed.

Despite hiding my emotions, I could feel a small smile creeping onto my face. "Thank you," I said, my voice warmer then I expected it to be. "I never knew… What I was capable of." And I didn't. My parents never let me use my powers, and I had never tried.

They meant danger. I couldn't hurt anyone. Anna started walking up the stairs. I could feel fear inside me. "I'm so sorry about what happened, if I had known!" Anna began.

I quickly drew back and said, "No, no, it's okay. You- you don't have to apologize. But you should probably go. _Please." _

"But I just got here!" Anna said happily.

"You belong down in Arrendelle," I replied. And she did. She belonged there, exploring, making friends, meeting new people. It was my fault she didn't. I could feel tears welling up in my eyes.

I had destroyed her whole childhood. I really was a monster.

"So do you," Anna replied.

"No, Anna, I belong here. _Alone!_" I said, my voice catching on the _alone _part. I swallowed and continued, "Where I can be who I am… Without hurting anybody."

Anna got a funny look on her face. "Actually, about that…" I tensed, sensing bad news.

Suddenly, I heard another voice. "Sixty!"

"Wait, what is that?" I asked. A small, familiar-looking snowman skipped into the room. It was Olaf. The snowman I'd built on my night of happiness. The night of my freedom. But how was he moving?

"Hi! I'm Olaf and I like warm hugs!" He practically sang, holding his little arms out.

"Olaf?" I asked.

"You built me! Remember that?" He asked, standing next to Anna.

"And you're alive?" I asked.

He studied himself. "Um… I think so?" He said/asked. I studied my hands, shocked. I had no idea how dangerous I was now, bringing something to life.

"He's just like the one we built as kids!" Anna said, kneeling down next to Olaf.

"Yeah!" I said, warm memories flooding into my head.

"Oh, Elsa, we were so close! We could be like that again!" Anna said.

And then I had the worst flashback of my life. Again. The one I had every day when I was locked in my room. The one I thought I could forget. The one I can't escape.

"Catch me!" Anna shouted gleefully, leaping into the air.

"Slow down!" I yelled back. All of a sudden, I slipped on a bit of ice. When I struggled to my feet, I saw Anna flying through the air. I lifted my hand and ice flew out of it. It collided with Anna's head and she collapsed onto the ground.

"Anna!" I gasped, holding her. A streak of white started to form in her hair.

I couldn't. I couldn't risk hurting her.

"No. We can't. Goodbye, Anna," I managed to get out. A single, crystal tear slid down my cheek. I turned away before anyone could see it.

"Elsa, wait." Anna said, hurrying up the stairs.

"No! I'm just trying to protect you!" I shouted, hurrying deeper into the palace. Why did Anna have to visit me? She made things worse. She dug up the pain that I spent over fifteen years trying to bury. She forced me to push her away again. Again.

"You don't have to protect me! I'm not afraid!" Anna yelled, hurrying up behind me. "Please don't shut me out again! Please don't slam the door! You don't have to keep your distance anymore!"

I started running away from her as fast as I could. '_Tire her out,' _I thought. _'Make her give up. I can't come back.' _

Anna started singing: "For the first time in forever, I finally understand! For the first time in forever, we can fix this hand in hand! We can head down this mountain together! You don't have to live in fear! Cause for the first time in forever… I will be right here!"

She has chased me into one of my favorite rooms, a room that had a balcony attached to it. I turned around. I needed to act calm and mature and make Anna realize she couldn't stay here. "Anna," I began. "Please go back home. Your life awaits. Go enjoy the sun and open up the gates!"

"Yeah- but," Anna started to interrupt.

I quickly cut her off. "I know! You mean well. But leave me be!" I threw open the doors to the balcony and stepped out. Anna followed me and I continued "Yes, I'm alone, but I'm alone and free!" I whirled around to face her and yelled "Just stay away and you'll be safe from… Me…"

That was all I really wanted. For everyone to live a nice, happy life where they wouldn't have to be hurt. Afraid. Shut out. Concerned. Endangered.

"Actually we're not!" Anna said.

"What do you mean your not?" I asked Anna.

"I get the feeling you don't know!" Anna said.

I rolled my eyes. I know so much more then Anna. _She _doesn't know about the awful flashbacks I had everyday, how I laid on my bed fighting the curse, how I talked to a rag doll every day so I didn't die of loneliness. She didn't know how painful my childhood had been, and how good it felt to be free. She had no idea how terrible it was to be cursed.

"What do I not know?" I snapped.

Anna took a deep breath and said, "Arrendelle's in deep, deep, deep, deep… snow…"

_"What?" _I gasped.

"You… kind of set off an eternal winter? Everywhere." Anna said.

_"Everywhere?" _I asked.

"That's okay, you can just unfreeze it!" Anna said.

"No I can't! I don't know how!" I said. Snow began falling in a circle around me.

"Sure you can! I know you can!" Anna replied. "Cause for the first time in forever!"

She started telling me about how I didn't have to be afraid, that we would work this out together and reverse this storm I'd made. Meanwhile, the snow started getting thicker and circling around me as I yelled profanities at myself… "Oh, I'm such a fool, I can't be free! No escape from the storm inside of me! I can't control the curse!"

I whirled around to face Anna and yelled "Oh, Anna, please, you'll only make it WORSE!"

"Don't panic!" She said back.

I turned around to see myself in the mirror. I was a true monster. I had frozen a whole town. Lives were in danger. And it was all my fault. I flinched and looked away. "You're not safe here!" I shouted.

The snow was so thick now that I could barely see Anna. Suddenly, something inside me snapped. "I CAN'T!" I screamed. At the same time, an icy blue bolt of magic flew out of my hand and throughout the room. I was facing the mirror.

I took a few deep breaths, trying to collect myself. And then I turned to see Anna hunched on the ground, holding her chest. I gasped. I had hurt her again. A man's voice suddenly shouted: "Anna!" A stocky man rushed into the room, followed by Olaf.

"Are you okay?" He asked, helping her up.

"I'm okay." Anna said determinedly. "I'm _fine." _

"Who's this?" I gasped. "Wait it- it doesn't matter. You have to go." The ice palace was re-freezing dangerously.

"No." Anna said. "I know we can figure this out _together!" _

_"HOW?" _I asked. "What powers do you have to stop this winter? To stop _me? _

"Anna," said the man. "I think we should go."

"No, I'm not leaving without you, Elsa," Anna said, yanking herself free.

"Yes, you are!" I said, lifting my hands. An enormous pile of snow appeared in front of them, slowly taking the shape of a giant snowman. It wouldn't kill them. It would just drive them away.

As it grew, I ran into another room, then burst into tears. Now what would I do? I tried to kill myself, but I couldn't. Ice didn't bother me. So I curled up into a ball, sobbing until I was unconscious. I had destroyed a whole kingdom… And my sister's life.

**So, do you like it? Please leave me some feedback! Constructive criticism is welcome, and most likely I will take your advice! Should I add another part with Anna's point of view as well? How about Kristoff's? Or should I do an entirely new one-shot? Let me know what you want to read next!**


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